Tar and I are trudging along in our breastfeeding journey. Lately, it seriously has become a laborious adventure. Our major snag seems to be that he hasn't developed a consistent and productive sleeping pattern. Of course what this means for ME, is that no proper sleep for him means NO proper sleep for me. See the emphasis on how it affects me? Did you catch that? lol
What puzzles me about this situation is that he seems to only have sleeping issues when he is sleeping with me. When he is at his Dad's house he sleeps like a rock. At least that is what the hubs says. Take last night for instance, Tar was up 6 times (yes people, SIX times) wanting to nurse. He didn't nurse a few minutes, it's as if he nursed for hours. I had to literally stop him from nursing so that I could shift my position because my body started aching from being in that position for so long. I'll admit that last night's feeding schedule was even a bit excessive for him. This seems absolutely ridiculous and insane that I would be dealing with these type of issues with a 22 month old.
Shouldn't he be following a healthy sleeping pattern by now? When he is home with me he will nurse all day long. It doesn't seem to affect his eating habits because he'll still eat table food when served. However, but I don't understand what he wants to nurse so much. In a given day I'd guesstimate that he nurses 5 or 6 times and then he'll probably nurse an additional 3 times after he goes to sleep at night.
I am a believer in gentle weaning and/or self weaning when possible. This situation seems to ebb and flow. Up until about a month ago things were getting better and it wasn't such a problem. However, about 4-5 months ago we were going through a similar situation as we are now and he started increasing how many times he was waking up to nurse. I got frustrated at that time and tried to wean him. It end up being a disaster. He wailed and wailed each time I tried to use other methods to get him to sleep. I tried every method I read about to prepare him for gentle weaning and the results were a complete failure. I gave up and went back to nursing. I'm not good at letting him cry himself to sleep and I couldn't pound the floors at night with him because I was working at that time.
I'm at a loss. I'm going to his pedi to confirm he doesn't have any ear infections and then I'm going to speak to a lactation specialist. I am just curious if anyone has ever dealt with these breastfeeding and sleeping concerns in a toddler. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Breastfeeding Woes
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Posted by Quiskaeya at 12:24 PM
Labels: Breastfeeding, Lessons in Motherhood, Lil One
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5 comments:
I had similar issues. A couple questions...How old is your little one, and are you co-sleeping?
Oh girl... been there, lived that!
My second child, Carter, was the world's worst sleeper from birth. He would ONLY sleep if he was nursing. Not just being held, but latched on. I never slept.. I was so miserable.
He self-weaned at abotu 16 months but STILL was a horrid sleeper. He no longer woke for nursing, but he'd wake up just as often, crying, fussing, cranky. I'd give him a cup, a pacifier, we co-slept and he'd toss and turn beside me ALL.NIGHT.LONG. I still got no sleep.
He finally learned to sleep around age 3.5. Omgosh.. it was the most glorious thing.. of course his baby brother had arrived by this time and I was still up all night. lol
If you're not enjoying nursing, I say go ahead and start cutting out nursing sessions a few at a time each week. He will NOT be happy about it, but if you're starting to really dislike nursing, I don't know that it's healthy for either of you to nurse out of obligation instead of as a bonding/loving experience.
At night, even if you wean him, just know that he MAY still wake up.. just like my son did. Or, he may not! I do think you'll be a zombie for a while b/c he will be upset about not nursing at night, but, in my opinion, if you can hold him, cuddle him, sing to him, offer a cup, a blanket, or something to let him know that you're still there to love him at night - just not to breastfeed - that that IS gentle weaning. Gentle weaning isn't always a happy experience for the toddler.. but if you feel his sleep is suffering due to nursing, I agree wtih you that that is not healthy for either of you.
It's a tough decision!! I've got your back whatever you decide! ;)
Butterbean nursed until he was 2.5 years. We were co-sleeping and it seemed like he woke up constantly. He wanted to latch on and go back to sleep. I weaned him and put him in a toddler bed next to us all at the same time. He finally started sleeping all night.
I have to agree with Mandy. It may be time to stop nursing if it is becoming a trial. I was no longer enjoying nursing so he had to be weaned. Butterbean was not happy, but looking back, it was not nursing that he missed, it was not getting his way that upset him.
I remember those times. You know it really was not all about nursing for me. I allowed them to keep the habbit too long because I felt bad for them. Then I realized that they would be fine and that in life things aren't always gentle and pain free. They were fine and I was a better mom after a good nights sleep.
Hang in there girl......
Hey, I had a couple of questions to ask you - blog related - but didn't want to do it out in public. lol Would you please drop me an email? mandydelancey@hotmail.com
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