I've never liked the structure. It probably has to do with the fact that I'm abstract and like to live spontaneously. Wanderlust. I have major wanderlust. If I could have moved from Florida years ago, skidmarks of my departure would be the only memories left behind. I would have been outta here that fast! Something, about having children forces a person to become more structured. Learning to embrace structure is a journey. Discovering the right structure is a challenge. How does one create structure in one's life that allows for a free flowing lifestyle, yet allows it to provide the right boundaries? Balance is key and I being a libra only flourish when balance is obtained. Lately, my balance has been tipped too far to the left or right.

Yesterday's church teaching was a great one for me. Pastor Bob gave this amazing illustration about being thrown into a pit and how sometimes that is the best place for growth. Think about it, if a person is in a pit what are the elements surrounding them? Dirt, sunlight (or SONlight) above and water beneath. These are the perfect elements to strout grow and lift a person out of the of their "pityful" situation.

I haven't done this incredible teaching any justice. However, if you are feeling like you've been thrown into a pit I highly recommend that you listen to his words of inspiration. Simply click here. If this link doesn't work then go here: http://www.calvaryftl.org/AWMedia/MediaDesk.cfm?fn=A1511 and on Sermon Archives choose the sermon date of 09/27/09.

Anyway, here we are on a Monday. The last Monday of September and I find myself at a crossroad. Life, in its many twists and turns has brought me to a junction and I need to batten down the hatches as the idom says. The good thing is that I have more time now than ever to really decide where we go from here. Today I'm just going to chillax and soak in a few things because the rest of the week is going to be FULL. I have to declutter. My decluttering mission will be about developing a family schedule and budget. I need to find a way to be able to work on some projects that I haven't been able to tackle because of lack of time. I have absolutely no excuse to not accomplish these things because now I do have time. Secondly, I need to get my boys on a schedule that we can all commit to regardless of what circumstances that may arise. I must buckle down about meals/grocery planning.

From what I know of me, the best schedules are the ones that include everything. My day has to be full written hour by hour. Example: Wake up at 6:30am, breakfast at 7am, Tiger to school by 7:45, etc.etc. I've realized I need to even pencil in when I'll take breaks, eat meals, how long I'll work on projects, when I can goof off and waste time network on facebook (love her!), twitter (learning to love her more daily...lol) and blogosphere (my love/hate relationship..ack).

Ive fallen into the trap before where I didn't dictate my day from the time I got up to the time I laid down and I alwayed ended up feeling like I accomplished nothing. The good thing is that I finally understand I can't do it all, everyday. I used to think I could. I thought I could cook homemade meals for every meal, clean the house daily, do laundry, tend to the family and accomplish my personal objectives. Maybe, there are Mamas out there that are doing it. Go on with your badself and get your Mama of the year award. I'm going to stay right here and keep my sanity. I'm not going to compete with you, nor am I going to try to be you.

However, if you or any Mamas have advice/thoughts and resources to recommend on how to give Mamahood more structure, I'm listening. Just because I'm not trying to be you doesn't mean that I think I can't learn from you. I'm all ears.....

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